The first few weeks of pregnancy: You're sick and it's a secret

You're Sick & it's a secret | momming is hard

So you just found out you are pregnant! You've been having non stop sex for months (yay!!) and have peed on a thousand little sticks waiting for that second pink line to show itself in all its infinite glory and finally it does! You laugh, you cry, you pick out names for if it's a boy or if it's a girl. Your pillow talk is giddy and exciting and you agree to keep it a secret until 12 weeks, just in case. 

A couple weeks later, the morning sickness hits. And if you are like me, it's not morning sickness. It's all day sickness. Sick in the morning. Sick in the evening. Sick in the afternoon. It never gives up. It is the energizer bunny of nausea. That son of a bitch. You are sicker than you've ever experienced, but you can't complain about it because you are keeping the pregnancy a secret until 12 weeks (which happens to be when you will probably begin to recover unless you are me...because why would I ever recover that early from morning sickness?!). This is the time you need help the most, but no one knows that you need help because it's still a secret.   

On top of the fact that you are sick, the pregnancy is all you can think about and it's all you want to talk about. Clear your search history because heaven forbid someone find out you have been googling "foods to avoid when pregnant." While you're at it, switch your "BABIES!!" board on Pinterest to "secret" because everyone knows once you start to fill up their feeds with pins on "30 AMAZING ORGANIC HOMEMADE BABY FOOD RECIPES" and "HOW TO GET YOUR FETUS TO SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT" that you are totally knocked up!

These weeks of sickness and secrecy are hard and lonely and literally nauseating. I urge you to find someone to open up to so you are not so alone. Your husband will try to understand, but it's not the same. I always liked using the birth boards on to find a whole community of women who were all carrying this huge secret in a pea sized package. Ignore the fact that some of those ladies are totally bat-shit crazy, because you may find a collection of normal women just like you looking to share their secret with a stranger. It helps to talk about it. Call a friend you trust, or your mom or find a stranger who can relate. Only a few weeks to go until you decide to share your news with the world. 

NOTE: I think it's great when people share their news immediately and also love when people keep their micro monster a secret as long as they can. Don't listen to what others tell you is appropriate. Decide alone with you and your spouse when the right time to share your news will be and respect your spouse enough to stand by your decision. 

And...if you need to tell someone. You can always tell me.